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Advice please - another bad patch

Posted by Lynne on November 06, 2001 at 00:13:46:

Hi everyone!

Regular readers might know that after being addicted to meds for years for horrific chronic insomnia I finally got off them (cold turkey) in February and since then it has been ups (a few) and downs (a lot). I have been following Gregg Jacobs' programme for a few months now, and do not allow myself more than 6 hours in bed at night. I must say it has helped me and I have had good periods, but they don't seem to last very long. Last week I had a really good week for me, but last night the demon came back. After spending the whole evening fighting off sleep until my designated bedtime, when I went to bed I just couldn't sleep. My problem has always been that either I fall asleep straight away in bed or I don't sleep at all all night long - there are no half measures. I know that some people manage to fall asleep after two or three hours, but I have never managed to do that.
Basically, my question to you all is, what the hell do you do when you get out of bed as all the books advise you to? I am always so exhausted I simply cannot read, as I would like to, or do anything. I just sit on the sofa feeling very agitated, try to read occasionally, don't manage to do it because of tired eyes, try to sleep occasionally, don't manage that either, get more frustrated and agitated.
I have been using self-hypnosis to help myself, but I have only been doing it during the day, because I found it was more helpful for me. If I do it at night it reminds me of why I am doing it and even if I think for a moment of the dreaded sleep/insomnia issue, that's it - WHAM! sleepless night.

Is there anyone out there who has the same problem? How do you keep the nocturnal agitation at bay? My mind feels so agitated during these nights that I just cannot concentrate on anything, so am incapable of doing the usual relaxation exercises, meditation, etc. I feel bored, restless and frustrated and just don't know what to do about it. Last night I tried watching a little TV during the night, and it does seem to work a little, in that it takes my mind off sleep and I start to feel sleepy again. But when I switch off the light, it's the same old story! Being sleepy but not being able to sleep - what torture!

I know I have to remain positive and am desperately trying to do so, but any advice would be most welcome.

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