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Posted by insomniacagain on March 01, 2007 at 13:40:01:In Reply to: Re: thinking outloud... posted by sova on March 01, 2007 at 13:19:47:
Sova-
Thank you so much for your note - I'm glad to hear that someone can relate to my point of view. You ask why I got off the Paxil - there are two main reasons. For one, yes, my life was on track and finally had stability in it (which was previously missing due to hectic schedule around graduate school and work, some struggles with my then-boyfriend now fiance, etc). I'd like to add though that it didn't erase all the anxiety that has built up in me since I was a child (stemming from my parents' personalities, their marital problems to which I was a constant witness, overachiever orientation, etc). Second, I'd like to start a family within the next two years and wanted to clear my system of any synthetic medication that could impact my baby - I figured I'd give it sufficient time to heal from Paxil use as short as it was. Paxil has been found to produce cardiac abnormalities in newborns. Other than that, Paxil has been a good medicine for me with really minimal side effects which all went away rather quickly - I did gain a little bit of weight but not as much as other people report plus the benefit of getting restful sleep outweighed everything else. The withdrawal wasn't very pleasant but once again not as severe as other users. Now, that my insomnia is back in spite of a good life and I'm not finding much help from natural remedies I might consider going back to a safer form of medication. I've never taken sleeping pills and benzos and will surely avoid them. As much as I'd like to be meds free, I feel that anti-depressants are better than the rest of sleep aids out there. I'm not sure how I will tackle the pregnancy issue but luckily I have a great gynecologist whom I'll be consulting this month.
Also, I will return to my reading of the "Good Night to Insomnia" book and utilize some of the cognitive strategies as hard as it is. Bottom line, similarly to you I'm no longer embarassed to say that I might have to spend the rest of my life with some extra help to lead a normal, restful life and trust me for a person of my personality and a perfectionist drive (equated with self-sufficiency) it's a big step for me.
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