Help! Bad night
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Help! Bad night

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Posted by sleepymom on November 20, 2008 at 05:08:33:

Ok, I admit, I have been working very hard on trying to be a good rester, if you will. I will lie patiently in my bed and breathe deeply for hours if that is what it takes. But last night, after I went to bed at 11:30 and did my deep breathing, I was up at 12:30, then 1:30 and still at 2:30, at which time I began to completely unravel. I whined, I cried, I stomped around the house and I even called my poor mother at 3:30 am to ask her if I would be ok in the morning. She is very patient with me about this but I feel so embarassed when I act like such a baby. I am totally fine today and knew I would be. I am a bit tired, but not terribly. I am managing fine in my classroom today. I just don't understand why I don't trust myself when I have trouble sleeping. My husband doesn't want to hear about it. He thinks that it is all up to me and that if I would just lie there quietly I would be fine. I think he is right, but I get very little compassion from him about this. How do I learn to believe that I will survive this? How do I learn to believe that at 3am, when everthing looks bleak? Why do I act like such a baby when it comes to a lack of sleep? I do not act like this about anything else. I get so frightened some nights that I will lose it and think I will go out to the brink of insanity and never return. I know this isn't true, but why do I struggle so at 3am? Am I doing this to myself? Am I causing myself not to sleep? I want to sleep but I had trouble gearing down last night and then threw in the towel. I need some reassurance that I am not losing it and how do I believe in myself at 3am that I can survive this? I know that one person here said they have had this for over 40 years. How did you knowyou would survive? How did you know you wouldn't lose your sanity? Man, how quickly the tide turns when you are sleep deprived. Thanks to any and all who respond.

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