Posted by Samantha on November 11, 2009 at 12:57:48:

In Reply to: Re: ForceSleep product anyone? posted by optimistic on November 11, 2009 at 12:24:20:

Absolutely. If I end up missing one night's sleep (usually followed by proggesive onset insomnia) I usually end up on a downward spiral of serious onset/maintenance insomnia and then I get the dreaded 'adrenalin loop'- that constant burning in my chest and butterflies in my stomach then there is no sleep and no food and no life. As each day passes, I become more wired feeling and can't even lie still for five minutes without feeling that build up of panic, then I start dwelling on it and I become obsessed by sleep and convince myself I will never sleep normally again and then I get several weeks of panic/anxiety attacks and make myself very sick indeed. Some people have had a panic attack, maybe a few during their lives. I was getting seven or eight bad ones per day, but they never really went away, I just learned to control them. I will not be driven to self harm ever again.

I was in a terrible state one day so I phoned the mental health crisis line and was sobbing because I had not slept in three straight nights and not even a nap and she said 'have a cup of tea'. Thanks a bunch. I don't rely too much on outside help now. I do keep my psychiatrist appointments though because if I get discharged back to the care of my GP, I will have to go through the whole referral thing again. As it is, the mental health service where I live know about my problems and all I have to do is call them and somebody will come out to see me. I hate this though, it's like a stigma. It has cost me four jobs, friendships and my sanity and it all started with sleep disruption - not, as the health care professionals like to think, depression. I am depressed because my sleep got ruined. I used to have no problems sleeping and would use sleep to have a break from my problems but then the Sleep Grinch stole it! Or maybe I messed it up with drugs, I don't know. Psyche disorders do run in my family though and my sister has problems and my mother (affectionately known as the Anti Christ) is/was an alcoholic with bi-polar mania! I decided not to have children! I will not let this illness rob my sense of humour though. I think we all have to try and smile and laugh to keep ourselves sane! I guess none of us who post here miss a night's sleep then feel all nice and extra sleepy the next day. Sleepy? What's that?

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