Posted by lucy_84 on February 06, 2008 at 11:59:48:Hi everyone my name is Lucy and today I finally got some sort of 'diagnosis' to the strange episodes I have been experiencing whilst about to fall/falling asleep. I will outline the first time it happened as briefly as possible, but excuse me if it sounds ridiculous, but i hope it makes as much sense as it possibly can!
To be honest, at first, I thought I was asleep. I knew I didnt feel like I was, because it felt so much different to a dream. A sudden urge of fear came over me, a really intense feeling. I always sleep with my mobile phone under my pillow, as I use the alarm clock application to wake me up. (this has no bearing on not being able to wake up or anything like that, I simply do not have an alarm clock!) Anyway, I reached for my mobile (possibly to see what time it was as this is the only reason why I would normally reach for it) I felt myself press the buttons, i could feel the rubber texture, but the light didnt come. So I climbed out of bed, not being able to see (i thought this was due to the light not being on) and flicked the switch to my lamp. I didnt hear the click, I just felt it. The light didnt come on. Still feeling incredibly fearful, I made my way, in 'the dark' towards my door, again I could feel my feet walking across the room, but could not 'hear' my footsteps. I pulled down on the handle and proceeded to walk down the hall into my flatmates room, where I stood at the end of her bed and froze. I tried to scream but I couldnt. By this time I was terrified.. I dont remember walking back to my room as such, but I remember climbing into my bed and 'waking' from what I could only describe as a trance. I physically COULD NOT move, no matter how hard I tried, for maybe 30 seconds to a minute. My mouth was dry, I was sweating so much that my bed clothes were damp, shaking and by the time I had regained some sense of 'conciensness' in the way of being able to move, I was in tears. I really want to highlight that I would love to say this was a dream. But the fact that I felt everything from the pressing of the buttons on my mobile, to the pulling down of the door handles and the openening of the doors, it cant have been. But why could I not see or hear anything?
The next few weeks I kept having this feeling of fear, a terrible pressure in my head that would then extend to my whole body, just before I fell asleep. I didnt experience anything like the above but for a short time, 20-30 seconds, I couldnt move. No matter how hard I tried. But I was able to open my eyes.
I went to see my normal GP, last friday, who said they were probably night terrors, seeing as I was tring to scream in the first episode, and that I should try and map out an ending to this dream in order for the episodes I was experiencing after this 'dream' to cease.
Not convinced I pretty much ignored the consultation as I knew she was wrong. I have had bad dreams, like everyone else... these were not anything remotely like them.
But, last night I was lying on the couch with my laptop next to me, after watching a programme online. This time, as i wasnt tucked up in bed, the light was on. Again, as I was falling asleep I had the same familiar feeling, this time not so intense, more worry than fear... this bit is going to sound silly, but I knew I needed the toilet, and although I didnt walk to the bathroom (my eyes were closed) I could see the toilet seat and felt myslef grab the toilet seat to pull it up... the next thing my eyes were open and I could still feel the width of the toilet seat between my finger and thumb.. sounds ridiculous but I did warn you! The main thing about this is the light was on, I could see everything perfectly, but I couldnt move, again, this time probably for longer than ever before... I could move my eyes to see everything in the room but no matter how hard I tried, I could not physically move.
I dont have narcolepsy as I dont fall asleep spontaneously. However I get this feeling, on a daily basis pretty much, that I am going to pass out, faint. Things go blurry and I need to sit down. This has all only just recently started to happen. I am also, on occasion, finding it increasingly difficult to find the right words I need when speaking.. my sentences become slower and if you knew me, I could normally talk for Britain so u can understand why this is all freaking me out!
I went to see a different GP today and she said it sounded like hypnagogic hallucinations.
I am always tired, but then I'm quite a busy person. Can you have these symptoms and not have narcolepsy? Should I be worried that these feeling like I am going to faint episodes are one day going to result in me falling asleep? I just dont know. But I welcome any help!!
I will just add that I have today read that people experience a ringing like sound.. I think what I hear sounds more like a bathroom fan.
I am 23 years old. Will I have this forver and is there anything I can do about it?
Sorry for the rambling but I wanted to cover everything as best I could. I hope someone can help!!
Lucy